I hate twitter

I don't like Twitter because I feel people will make misinformed impressions on me on whatever I seldomly post. Because basketball is not the only thing I do or am concerned with in my life... Because i'm not a loser for being so excited over Europe because i've been before and I could've been excited like 10 months ago when we booked it but chose not to... I hate social media actually and that's why I don't like posting stuff. Because i'm so scared and anxious over other people's judgement. I think it comes from not having any friends. The only people in my life who know the full picture is my family. I don't think I would feel the need to post anything if I had more friends who knew me inside-out. I wouldn't have to prove anything or inform anyone about what's going on. Why can't everyone know i'm talented in my ability to produce cool videos or why can't they know i'm cool and worldly because i've travelled since I was literally a year old and have been to so many places in the world without having to post fancy videos or photos on social media to prove it? Again, it's because I don't have close friends. Even my close cousins don't know the full picture. Posting on social media is my way of showcasing the good aspects of my life because I feel like people should know because my life is actually quite sweet. Maybe I should just be content with my life without needing gratification from others. But how? What's the point of doing the things I do? People won't know how sweet it is or how great I am. But then again, while I have friends and cousins I could tell stuff to, I feel it'll be boastful. And I am not boastful. I'm humble and I don't like to brag. But how will they know? What gets me angry is that other people get recognition for this and that when been there, done that! Maybe I need to be more humble and just content with what I have and who I am without comparing myself to others. Maybe I just have to wait so people can figure things out about me as life progresses. But i'm not getting any younger and i'm getting old and obsolete and outdated in my skills and knowledge on things... I guess I should just be more content with me.

Ugh. My existence is a mess. Maybe my problem is my head thinking stupid thoughts and construing all the fine details into negativity. I don't even want to continue trying to work things out because I know i'll just come to a conclusion I knew from the start and one that won't make any difference in my life whatsoever. I'm just making myself stressed and very confused. Life is shit.